Morning Has Broken

The UN has called for an emergency meeting to discuss the implications of the breaking of this morning. Jack Straw accused Iran of having a hand in this unprecedented phenomenom, while George Bush, the President of the most powerful country in the world, was unavailable for comment. A Whitehouse spokeswoman said he was reading a book about fluffy bunny rabbits to his two poodles. Tony Blair was also present.

It's not yet known whether this morning can be fixed, and if tomorrow morning will also be broken. Engineers are being sent out to determine the extent of the damage, and to establish if any repairs are possible. Mr. Flinchbottom, a scientist in morningology, said "It's unlikley that we will be able to repair this morning, because it's now lunchtime. Meaning that morning has now passed, and therefore no longer exists. It's very difficult to repair something that no longer exists, you see?"